When you gave us this topic, I told my friends: ‘OK. I’m not going to write about this because I don’t have anything to say’. I can say for myself that I was always a good kid. I have never been on drugs, I’ve never changed my hair so dramatically and the most embarrassing thing is that I’ve never skipped over my classes at elementary school. But, reading over my diary I found out that I had one stupid phase in my life.
It was in elementary school and the biggest problem at that time was how to attract a very popular boy. I tried everything. But the dumbest thing was that I tried to become another person, one who will make his dreams came true I was trying to join the group of popular ones, to dress like they did, to listen the music of popular group that I didn’t like. It was very difficult to adapt to that kind of ‘society’ because you couldn’t have your own opinion about a certain thing. You just had to think like others did. At that time, I didn’t know I was loosing myself and living my life in a body of another person.
I think that we all had this kind of a phase. In elementary school, we are trying to form a little bit of our personality and to become a special human being, to be unique. That is the period when we meet a lot of people and we are trying to find as much friends as we can to be ‘popular’ in our way. We aren’t considering other options; we are just trying to get what we want. That is our best weapon to go through the future and to be accepted by others.
I can’t say that I regret about my past. I had my bad and good moments like everyone did. I should be grateful because I found out more about myself. Now, I don’t have to be popular to be loved. I can be who I am and have the most wonderful man at the same time. Finally, my dreams came true.
Definitely, I can’t compare my phase with Curly Oxide’s phase. I wouldn’t have the courage to confront my parents on my tradition. But he didn’t do anything bad. He just tried to explore his options and to find his own personality.
Maybe, that is the only way to figure out that those things that we have in our lives are the best or the worst possible ones for us.
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2 comments:
Hi Anela,
I am a close friend of Chaim aka "Curly Oxide" and I am following closely the developmet of the movie about his life.
Google alerts me when they find anything about Curly Oxide on the internet and they pointed to you today. I guess they read your blog...
Im trying to understand why his story fascinates so many, maybe you can shed some light.
To respond to MP's comment:
I am Anela's teacher--we listened to the Curly Oxide story on "This American Life" in our English class at a university in Mostar, BiH. The students wrote in their blogs about experimental phases after listening to the story. I have to say, everyone seemed to enjoy the story quite a bit.
You say there's a movie? Who's doing it?
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